Vale Sally Brampton
The damn dog finally got Sally Brampton. In May, the highly acclaimed author, editor and agony aunt walked into the sea near her home on the Sussex coast.
A couple of years ago I read and reviewed her 2008 memoir Shoot the Damn Dog. It’s a challenging but ironically optimistic book. Some called it a ‘coming out‘ story. But Brampton claimed that after her breakdown she’d read everything she could on the subject, except the one book she really wanted to find – a personal account on what it feels like to live with depression.
“Imagine saying to somebody that you have a life-threatening illness, such as cancer, and being told to pull yourself together or get over it.
Imagine being terribly ill and too afraid to tell anyone lest it destroys your career.
Imagine being admitted to hospital because you are too ill to function and being too ashamed to tell anyone, because it is a psychiatric hospital.
Imagine telling someone that you have recently been discharged and watching them turn away, in embarrassment or disgust or fear.
Comparisons are odious. Stigmatising an illness is more odious still.”
Sally Brampton, Shoot the Damn Dog
Despite being able to rationalise her death, I still feel great sadness that she will write no more books or insightful columns. Though the grief as a reader is nothing in comparison, my thoughts are with her daughter joining the ranks of the many children who’ve lost a parent to mental illness.
“You don’t say to someone with pneumonia “cheer up” or “get over it””
It’s time to destigmatise mental illness and bring issues like depression, anxiety and suicidal thought out into the open. If you don’t know what to say to a friend whose struggling, a few of these suggestions may be useful.
Vale Sally Brampton, an inspiring writer and mental health advocate. You did your best; you lived your life with a debility that few could even begin to understand. Thank you for your honesty and wise words.
“Killing oneself is, anyway, a misnomer. We don’t kill ourselves. We are simply defeated by the long, hard struggle to stay alive. When somebody dies after a long illness, people are apt to say, with a note of approval, “He fought so hard.” And they are inclined to think, about a suicide, that no fight was involved, that somebody simply gave up. This is quite wrong.”
Sally Brampton, Shoot the Damn Dog
Links
Lousie Chunn: My friend Sally Brampton, and why we need to talk about mental health.
Washington Post Ashamed and Unwell (a fantastic article on coming out about a mental illness).
Brené Brown’s TED talk on shame.
Beyondblue Suicide fact sheet.
Sane How to help when someone is suicidal.
Updated: 2.6.16 additional links added.
Similar Posts:
Social Share
One Comment
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
Pingback: Gill Stannard » June update